From uni project to long-distance relationship: Our story

Curious what it’s really like to be in a long-distance relationship? Below, I’m sharing my story. From how it all started to where we are now, it includes the good, the tough, the airport goodbyes, and the creative ways we stayed connected. From how it all started to where we are now (spoiler: still figuring it out), here’s a look into what long-distance has meant for us.

Our story - a trip through memory lane

How we met - May 2021

Deep in Covid times, I was juggling my final two assignments of the year. I was studying International Creative Business, and one of my assignments was all about how to grow upcoming bands through smart marketing.

I picked out 2 indie rock bands in the UK as options, and my teacher chose one of the bands as my artist. I researched out to them to do an interview, and they agreed to do it. Spoiler alert: they ghosted me on the day of the interview. I know, brutal right?

As I had to do an interview with either the artist, or an expert, I decided to send the drummer of the other band a message, to ask him if he wanted to do the interview with me. Kind of a shot in the dark - he replied and said yes.

And that, my friends, is how a failed interview (and the sad realization that you can’t record Instagram video calls) turned into something much bigger.

Back when we were cute - May till October 2021

The interview actually went surprisingly well — it felt more like chatting with someone I already knew than anything formal. Afterwards, I messaged him to say thanks.Like I mentioned before, the interview didn’t get recorded, something I found out not so long after. So I messaged him asking if I could get a bit more input. His reply? He was very busy (rude, honestly). I figured that was that and moved on.

Until… Saturday night rolls around — and by night, I mean actual midnight, because yes, I was up watching Eurovision results — and suddenly, I get a message from him. We started talking about how both our countries scored a glorious zero points from the public vote (tragic), and from there, the conversation just... kept going.

Over the next few days, we were chatting late into the night. Just fun, easy conversations, getting to know each other better. The texts turned into calls, and calls into FaceTimes. Pretty soon, we were making plans to meet up in person. The original idea was for him to visit me, but thanks to covid, that became almost impossible.

So we got creative — virtual date nights, watching movies together, making playlists for each other, and even sending over snack boxes filled with Dutch and English treats. Honestly, probably the cutest thing we’ve done so far.

Nearly half a year later - October 2021

After what felt like a lifetime of COVID restrictions, we finally got the green light: I was allowed to enter the UK (after three negative COVID tests, of course). So, on October 14th, 2021, I packed my bags, braved the airport solo for the first time, and flew to Manchester.

Matthew picked me up at the airport, and we headed back to his parents’ place – where he was temporarily staying in between moves. Naturally, we got stuck in traffic for over half an hour. But honestly? It kind of set the tone for the weekend. No awkward silences, just non-stop chatting and good vibes – exactly how we imagined it.

That weekend was everything. We realized this was more than just a one-time visit. So we made the call: we were going for it. Long-distance it was.

Surviving Long Distance - till February 2023

We tried to see each other every month — one month I’d hop on a plane to visit him, the next he’d come to me. Aside from the obvious joy of seeing each other, exploring each other’s countries made it even more fun. He’d never been to Amsterdam, so naturally, I gave him the full tour (stroopwafels included). In return, he showed me around Manchester.

Every visit turned into a mini-adventure. We packed our weekends with dates, fun activities, and introductions to friends and family. It actually worked really well for us for quite a while. But after some time, we both started wondering: what would it be like to live a bit closer? To hang out without planning flights months in advance?

That thought stuck with me — especially since I had to start looking for an internship for the following year. So, I began searching for companies in the UK that might take me on for six months. Spoiler alert: not easy. Finding a place willing to take me was already a challenge… but getting the visa? That was a whole new level of stress.

In October 2022, I finally found a company that wanted to take me on as an intern and was willing to help with the visa sponsorship. Then came the waiting game (and wow, was it a long one). But after months of refreshing my inbox and crossing my fingers, I finally got the green light in February: in just two weeks, I’d be moving to the UK for six whole months!

A new kind of normal - February till July 2023

From having a whole sea between us (and no chance of just "driving over") to living only half an hour apart — talk about an upgrade. I lived in a shared house near my work, so we weren’t under the same roof, but we saw each other all the time. Honestly, we settled into the new normal within hours. It finally felt like a regular relationship… whatever regular means.

We did all the usual couple things: cute dates, movie nights in, or just lying next to each other doing our own thing in comfortable silence (10/10 underrated). We also played tourist and visited London, Brighton, and York together — highly recommend, by the way. And somewhere along the way, we got our answer to the big question: was this just a long-distance spark, or did it work when we were actually close? Which it did.

The only thing that started to weigh on me? Becoming short-distance in my relationship meant becoming long-distance with my family. And yeah, that part stung. But I reminded myself I was lucky — lucky that home was just a quick flight away. I managed to visit twice during those six months, which definitely helped ease the homesickness.

Some pictures of my time in England

We visited London for a few days. We went sightseeing, had some great food and saw a theatre show.

We went to Brighton for a gig. Probably one of my favourite places as it reminded me of home.

I ran 10 km for Charity. My internship asked if I wanted to join and I said yes. Probably my proudest moment.

Got dragged into many (many!!) English breakfasts

We got to see Coldplay live. Up until now I actually can't believe I saw them.

From short to long again - July 2023

You know what’s tougher than doing long distance? Doing it again after finally living close to each other. Honestly, this was probably the hardest phase of our relationship so far. We really struggled. At first, we kind of appreciated the calls and FaceTimes — they felt meaningful. But this time around? They quickly turned into something we dreaded. Not seeing each other regularly started to get to us. Cue the arguments and frustration.

It took a while (and some patience), but eventually we started to find our rhythm again. We began seeing each other monthly, just like before — but somehow, the goodbyes hit even harder now. Still, I had to focus on finishing my final year of uni, and Matthew had his hands full with band stuff. Slowly but surely, things began to feel more like "us" again.

What kept us going? Knowing that at some point, we’d start the process of getting me a visa — so I could move to England.

Four years later: where we are now

So here we are, May 14th, 2025 (officially 4 years after the interview), and I’m writing all of this down as a little update on where we’re at. Right now, we still try to see each other every month, but since we’ve started seriously looking into visas and planning to move in together, we’re also watching our budgets a bit more closely. Not exactly romantic, but very real. Plus, flights have become way more expensive than when I first started flying over.

We’ve only just started diving into the whole visa process and figuring out what’s actually needed. Let’s just say: we’re still at the “googling everything and panicking slightly” phase. Thanks, Brexit. It's already feeling a bit overwhelming, and we're only just getting started.

So if you happen to have gone through this process yourself — or know someone who has — any tips, advice, or just a bit of moral support would honestly mean the world. Don’t hesitate to reach out!

And that’s it for now. If you're curious to hear more about our long-distance life, I’ll be posting blogs here and updates over on social media. Stay tuned!

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